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Full Steam Ahead
TOTP Yearbook 2004
It doesn’t take much before Darius feels all hot and steamy! So when faced with a pile of TOTP ironing it’s no wonder we found out about his burnt bits!
Uh-oh, there’s a huge pile of ironing – reckon you could give us a hand Darius?
Yeah, I do! I always do my own ironing, except when I’m about to run on stage and I’ve got a creased shirt or if I’ve got an interview like this to do. Then my tour manager grabs the ironing board, does my cuffs and collars quickly and says, “Now you can do the rest of this shirt, you should have done it earlier.”
When you were little did you help with the ironing?
I was quite good, I actually liked to help around the house cos I realised that helping Mum in the house equalled more pocket money, equalled more CDs. I wasn’t stupid!
Can you even iron the tricky bits like collars and cuffs?
Absolutely! I know where to put the creases. I’m not an iron king but if it doesn’t work out in pop I know I’ve got a job down the local launderette! I can iron a shirt properly in 60 seconds. I’m pretty hot….. almost as hot at ironing as the iron is itself, I’m sizzling!
What do you hide at the bottom of the pile for someone else to do?
I’d hate to iron big blue Y-fronts cos to be honest, if someone has a bum that big, it’s their bum that needs ironing, not the pants. There’s no need to iron pants and socks though, I can’t even do my jeans, it’s just shirts. Everything else is fine crumpled.
Do you buy clothes that don’t need ironing?
Absolutely! There are these great T-shirts you can get from Calvin Klein which you roll up, tie in a knot and put them in your suitcase. So I go on the road now with my little bag, my guitar and my knotted shirt. I don’t spend any more than two or three days in any one city or one country and I spend the time in a hotel room, so it’s knotted shirts all the way!
Have you ever burnt anything?
I left an iron on a pair of jeans once. The jeans were just lying there – it wasn’t like I’d even planned on ironing them. It left one of those big, black iron marks and burnt holes. I just cut a big hole out of the jeans and customised them. I stuck a patch of denim material underneath and the next day someone commented and said, “I like Your D&Gs”. The jeans were only really from Top Shop! See, now that’s style!
How about burning yourself?
Yeah, and it was horrible. The iron dropped on my thumb and I got this big blister. And you know when you get a blister and you can’t help flicking it and biting it – or is that just me? Anyway, it was horrible! It got really big, then it burst. Eurgh!
What’s your ideal ironing situation?
Hmm, my ideal ironing situation would have to be if a girl asked me to iron her lingerie! Lingerie blatantly doesn’t need ironing so it would obviously be a chat-up line. It would be a great way to start a date!
So what favourite track would you iron ladies’ lingerie to?
Hot in Herre by Nelly is the best one! So take off all your clothes! You know, I’ll be really getting into the music, I’ll be standing there in my pants ironing the shirt I was wearing, going, What am I doing? Nelly! Nelly! What are you making me do?!”
Darius’ Top Ironing Tip
Always fill your iron with water before you switch it on because otherwise you get that dry iron smell, which is horrible. And if you fill it up when it’s on it steams in your face and burns your nostril hairs – you really shouldn’t be doing that!